Make Me an Instrument.

"God, make me an instrument. Amen."

People always ask, “Why doesn’t miracle always happen? Why doesn’t God make it happen often?”
I asked the same question too sometimes and I always forgot about the prayer above. I do say it often, but I didn’t really get into it deep enough.
“..make me an instrument.”

As I go deeper into it, I realized, by saying this prayer, it means that I want to get involve. In what? In making miracle happen myself. God want us to get involve, in miracle.
Who knows, we can be a miracle for someone. So this is what it really means. To get involve. To be part of it. To be like Him. God-like. To surrender.

But doesn’t it sounds like,
“give me more problem to solve?”
Well, it does! But that’s the point! Don’t get it? For me, it’s the kind of bold and aggressive approach to life’s challenges that will positively endear me to God. It’s not easy of course, but I remember the promises He gave from the early beginning.

I don’t know how to say this but I think ‘being an instrument’ is like exercising. You’ll become stronger, healthier. By making me an instrument, He is ‘sharpening’ me and so now I have no doubt in saying this, 

"God, make me an instrument. Amen."

..use me in any way You desire, Lord.

He is Sufficient

I would love to share the things I read. Last December, I spent most of time on books. One of them is Encouragement for Life- Words of hope and inspiration by Charles R. Swindoll. I’d jot down some of the important points from the book and I think it is nice to be shared. 

One of them is, the encouragement for self-doubt and insecurity. Everyone had been in that phase, I mean, doubting one ’s self and feeling insecure.  But what did the writer said? We are never closer to God than when trials come upon us.

Inadequacy. To be human is to feel inadequate..especially in glorifying Him. We are inadequate, incapable of glorifying God, unable to do His work in our own strength. But never forget, we have been bought with a price and the price paid was unimaginably high – the blood of Christ – and how we belong to Him. He owns us and this means, He have His own specific plan for each and everyone of us, and that He is working on us in His very own way. In our weaknesses, inadequacy, He will shine. He'll use them all for His glory. We know now, feeling inadequate, why He allows this feeling to have some space in us..so that it forces us to fully rely on Him, giving us the strength. To not run away. We are where we are now because He needs us to demonstrate His power. In our inadequacy, His power is made real...if we allow Him to take the wheel.

“My power is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” ~ 2 Cor 12:9 ~

So each time you feel insecure or beginning to have a doubt, remember, this is what He really wanted to say,

“My daughter, I know what I am doing. I know the pain of your heart right now. I know you feel overwhelmed, overloaded, pressed down. But believe me, I am touched with your situation and I have a plan. I am working out the details of your deliverance even now. Trust me!”

And..

“I want you to be you. I made you the way you are now because I know you better. Your stories, your life, the obstacles that lay ahead you. All you have now are going to fit and help you. Just be you.”

And also..

“You are not in the hands of blind fate! You are in My hands.”

Never doubt yourself. Remember the lines in Amos 7:14-15.

“I am not a prophet, nor am I the son of prophet; for I am a herdsman and a grower of sycamore figs. But the Lord took me from following the flock and the Lord said to me, ‘go prophesy to my people Israel.” ~Amos 7:14-15~

No matter who we are, how poor and weak we are, He is the one holding all the plan.

The Blind Man

“Lord, I believe,”

~John 9: 38~

Do you know this story? A story about a man, born blind and how Jesus searched for Him up and down the Jerusalem streets.

Again, I found myself somewhere between the lines in the Bible. This time, in this man’s position. Why am I sharing this? This is not for me alone.

Have heard about blind faith? What do you think?

 Every human, regardless of what religion or belief they are in, had been in the same condition where this man in John 9 was. Maybe some are still in that position. Feel bad? Worry not. If you haven’t reached the end of the story, continue reading. Jesus did say..
“I came to judge. So that the blind can see.”
So deep. Think of it.

So many unfortunate people in this world. Some can’t talk, others can’t walk, can’t hear, can’t see. Some remain in their unfortunate condition until the end of their life. But some are lucky enough to be able to experience the healing. Why is that? Maybe because they were chosen right from the beginning..to proclaim the glory of His name. So that the works of God might be displayed in them. Some were able to realize this, some were not. Why this man in John 9 was healed? Jesus chose Him. We too, were ‘blind’, but He works in His own way to heal us. He never ignore His own child whenever He passed by. He’ll always have time to heal.  As a child of God, all of us were chosen to proclaim His righteousness. To be able to see that, all we need to do is to believe. No one will be abandoned. When we were lost, He looked for us.
Jesus didn’t stop for lunch, hadn’t pause to rest. When He found Him, He placed a hand on the man’s shoulder, saying..“There you are! I’ve been looking for you!”
Can’t you see how deep that is?

Right after He put the mud-miracle on the man’s eyes, He asked him to wash in the pool of Siloam. But when the man came back, He was not there. So he went to the town and proclaimed the miracle to others but no one believed him. Instead, they kicked him out. Born blind only to be healed. Healed only to be kicked out. Kicked out only to be left alone.

I can see this same scenario happening these days.
 Sharing our faith to others, to those who are supposed to share the same thing, under that same Name. But as you can see, things are not always easy. After taking so much courage..finally, only rejection at the end. Like the one in the story. Being ‘kicked out’ sometimes..many times, and it hurts. This always happen. It happen to me too.

Like the man in the reading, I raced back, danced back, roared back ‘seeing’ for the first time. But yes, not everyone is happy enough to celebrate.

But Jesus, He heard that the man had been kicked-out and He searched the entire town for him.

He searched for me. He tracked me down. A troubled pauper.

“He put His hand on the man’s shoulder.”

He touched my shoulder and I turned. I ‘saw’ Him, the One who healed me. I know He cares. I know He understands. And I know I’m not alone.

“The man worshipped Him. He kept on wrapping his arms around the waist of the One who gave Him sight.”

I worship Him! Just like a bride, seeing her groom, I forgot about myself. Everything changes when I look at ‘my groom’. Just as He came to the blind man, He came to me..for me. For us.

The hand that touched the blind man’s shoulder touches my cheeks. The face that changes his life changes mine. And when I see Him, I will bow in worship.

Was blind, but now I see. Always, I will say

“Lord, I believe.”

Discouraged People ~Luke 5:1-11~

"Put out into the deep water and let down your nets for a catch."

The story on Luke 5 has always been my favourite in the Bible. Simply because it pops up every time I need it. I didn't realize about it until at that one time when everything seemed hopeless. Each time it happen this one particular story popped up. He is trying to pull me back again to where I began. Always.

The sleepless, fishless nights.. like Peter's. Yes, I've got some. But Jesus said to me

"It's not too late to try again."

Have I given Christ my boat?

My dead-end dilemma?

My struggle?

Have I really turned them over to Him?

Have I gone deep?

DEEP?

All those empty times, the sleepless, fishless nights..perhaps I haven’t gone deep enough. Maybe I should try the other side of the boat..go deeper. There, I may found what Peter found. God.

All this time, I tried to catch fish on my own. But most of the time, I just had a sleepless, fishless nights. Just like the one Peter had. My nets were empty and I didn't know where should my sail go. I always have that give-up look inside. But then, Jesus came into my empty boat.

As I allowed Him to enter my boat..He sat down. In silence He watched me. Smiling.

Unaware of what the future might hold, I cast my net into the open sea and He smiled. Hearing my sigh, He rose up, looked at the open water, and said

“It’s not too late to try again.”

So I spread my nets and put it into the water just as what He told me to do. I didn’t expect anything and just do what He said. Then He spoke again,

“Put out into the deep water.”

I nodded and did what He said.

While waiting the net to sink, I looked over my shoulder at Jesus. That time I didn’t really SEE what was happening. Jesus, knowing that I was about to half-sink into the water started to smile. Rising cheeks render His eyes half-moons. His teeth flashed beneath His whiskers. I could say His smile was the best smile I had ever seen, the one that I could always fall for over and over again. He tried to hold it back but couldn’t. As if there is much to smile about. At that time I think Jesus might say or had a monologue within Himself:

“Just wait until you see the net sinking.”

So there I was, fighting against the tearing nets. So many fishes! I am glad to have Him on my boat!

For some reason I could see myself in Peter’s place. God put me into the same boat where He had put Peter long ago. He allows me to play that one important role in the same story. To feel so hopeless, disappointed, exhausted..just like Peter. To feel love, hope, and mercy..just like Peter. To learn that it is never too late to start over..just like Peter.

There were times when I forgot Him. To forget about that half-moon eyes. Relying on my own understandings, my own strength instead of listening to that one Voice.

He knows where the fishes are. He created them. But somehow, due to my human eyes, I failed to see that. Thank goodness He is still willing to come into my boat to remind me about that divine fact. 

When I began to listen to Him, I began to sink into the blessings overflowed.

He cares enough to enter my boats.

The next door Saviour who whispers this words to the owner of empty nets,

“LET’S TRY AGAIN. THIS TIME WITH ME ON BOARD.”